“I’m all alone because all my friends have died. I’m not doing anything because I don’t have anyone to do them with anymore. I’m just waiting to die.” I have a variation of this conversation every few weeks with my grandfather each time I come to visit him at my parent’s home, where he has […]
read on: Live Out Your Time as Foreigners →I am 41 years old, and am starting to know who I am. I think a lot of people don’t need to think about this to find strength for their lives, because life is busy and full of the daily tasks of surviving day-to-day. But I lost three jobs in three years, jobs which I […]
read on: Surfacing →This has been a week of emotional ups and downs for me. I still remember that about a year ago I struggled with the beginning of a long period of depression that I am no longer swallowed by. I was talking about this with a friend this weekend, saying that I am noticing that my […]
read on: Joy is another way to say the dancing of the heart. →I have been greatly blessed the past few weeks, though I have been pressed to my limits at work. I have had a number of difficult situations at work with patients, insurance reviewers, and staff that have been quite distressing to me. But through it all I have been able to create beautiful art. I […]
read on: Acceptance, Rejection, and Contentment →I was thinking about this passage of scripture today, and wanted to share it here. It speaks to me of humility and honors broken things so beautifully… I Corinthians 1:18-31 For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of […]
read on: Remember →I keep having the goldfish dreams … it seems to be pressing on me, tugging at me, eating away at me. I have this sense that God is wanting me to go ahead and explore this composition, but I am not clear on the reason for this. I suppose that the journey is in the […]
read on: Release →Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I have been moved tremendously by grace this year. This has been a year I would not want to repeat, but one for which I am sure I will look back on as a year I grew tremendously. This was a year that I struggled with depression, […]
read on: Beautiful Grace →I am feeling so calm right now, like I am happy, and at the same time want to cry. Happy tears. Some kind of deep goodness has found a resting place in my heart. Today for group therapy, my plans were not working out. I could not get the printer to work for some reason, […]
read on: Beautiful Sadness →This entire month I have been seriously moved by my experiences drumming and painting in the presence of God. I am preparing for a show in January at Bethlehem Lutheran Church and am somewhat stressed about this as I always am preparing for a show. I am also quite interested in the way these shows […]
read on: God, What Are You Up To? →Tonight as I write I have realized that my heart is in a new place. I am changing, and I think it is for the better. I brought drums to church again today. Whereas before people needed to be called up to play along with the worship team, this time, all the footed drums were […]
read on: My Heart is Changed →